I’m lousy at trying to keep secrets that don’t really need to be secrets

Recently, Roomie and I have come full circle on an idea that first occurred to us a long time ago when I was wasting time on the internet.

Me: “Hey, did you know you can get like eight thousand dollars for donating your eggs? And it’s not even an invasive surgery or anything.”

Roomie: “Really? Count me in! What, do they just vacuum them out of you or something?”

Me: “Sure, something like that.”

Roomie’s boyfriend: “Yup, this is definitely the conversation I imagined us having when I drove down here this weekend.”

Anyway, fast forward a year or so. I can’t remember how we got back onto the topic, but one night Roomie is asking me if we want to sign up for a webinar for more info on egg donation. Well, sure. Why not? Now I can ask them if that question about blood transfusions is a deal breaker. I can’t help it that I was the poster child for random blood diseases when I was a kid. I spent a lot of time outside … and didn’t like to shower.

I inform Roomie that I’m totally on board, but we’re not allowed to actually TELL anybody about this endeavor. I’ll just tell them I’m having lady problems when I have to go to the doctor’s office. Nobody ever wants to ask about lady problems. It occurs to me a moment later that we may have to tell Kate if she finds comes home and finds us watching an egg-donation webinar in the living room.

We quickly discover that we have signed up for the wrong webinar when they start talking about “choosing a donor” and “getting pregnant.” This is for people who want to USE an egg donor. We do NOT need to use an egg donor. We are soooo very far from needing to use an egg donor. Kate comes home and I feel the need to blab about what we’re doing anyway, even though we’ve given up on the ambiguously-titled-and-completely-unhelpful webinar. And I tell her that she should do it too. 

Anyway, here’s to providing strangely invasive information to strangers on the internet. Don’t worry, it looks highly legitimate.



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